When I first discovered kinbaku, I was drawn to it because I saw it as a new, interesting form of communication. It's sensual and erotic, but in my mind, it's something completely different from a verbal conversation or sexual intercourse. It can have similar effects, I think. It can make someone feel relieved, make some feel like they aren't alone, even for a period of time, similar to how one might feel after having a chat with a good friend, except no words are necessary. It can also make people feel loved, and special, I think, but perhaps not always/all the time. But that's one of the great things about it, I think. It can be used in so many different ways and have various outcomes, making it extremely versatile and unique from traditional modes of communication.
That's how I feel about kinbaku from the inside, but there's a lot that can be gained from the outside, too. It's obviously artistic and beautiful, can be used for performance, or to communicate something not just between the two who are directly involved in the tying, but to the crowd/people watching as well.
Thank you for sharing. While communication through rope does not require words, it’s really nice to such thoughts in words too. Despite my years practicing kinbaku, or perhaps due to years practicing kinbaku, I find it very difficult to encapsulate what I feel in written and verbal mode of expression.
I think that -“It can also make people feel loved, and special, I think” - is something that can be felt from both the person tying and the person being tied. As a person tying, the energy and also the acceptance and trust that the person in my ropes gives to me touches many emotions on differing levels. So many things that are rarely said in words are communicated. At this point the only other person that exists in the person I am tying, and when that person shows the same to me, even if without words or gestures, it is very special.
I love that precise moment when the person I am tying completely let’s go. It can be a slight change in facial expression or the tension held in the muscles of the body. That is what drives me when tying (or untying) I guess. I mentioned untying because often this is the ‘icing on the cake’ so to speak. It is sensual, exciting, and at times spontaneous.
This is a great topic. With many answers. The one that comes to mind is...
Sex.
Just as there are many ways to have sex, and each person has sex in their own unique and personal manner, kinbaku is like that for me.
There is no right or wrong way to have sex or be intimate with someone. It will vary based on who you are intimate with at the moment. How you are both feeling. How long you've known each other. How comfortable you are.
No one can "teach" you how to have sex. It is instinctual. Yes, there are some "technical" aspects that a book or sex educator can tell you about. But ultimately each person will decide what works best for them.
Kinbaku is like that for me. It's a personal journey of learning and exploration. Discovering what works for me and the person I am tying. There is no one tie or method or style that I adhere to. It will vary based on many factors and will evolve overtime. The great bakushi Yukimura Haruki once said, "rope is free." And he is correct. What is right for me may not be right for someone else. And that's okay. That is how it should be.
That is the beauty of kinbaku. It is not a competition to see who can "tie" the perfect gote or make a more interesting hishi pattern. It's not about the rope at all. If you focus too much on the rope, you are missing the entire point. The rope is a tool in the tool box. Any type of material to bind can replace the rope.
Kinbaku is ultimately about the silent sharing and understanding that can happen between two people. An intimate sharing that does not have to be sexual at all. It can be intensely emotional. It can be erotic (or not). It can lead to joy, tears of sorrow, feelings of pain or pleasure.
Kinbaku is all that an more. And something that is very personal and special to each individual in our community.
Kinbaku came to me in 2016 during the summer, I just arrived in Paris to live my new life. First thing I did as an art student is to visit Guimet, the Asian Museum where a photographic exhibition was hold. There I discovered the work of Araki Nobuyoshi and though "that's what I want to do".
So, indeed, to me Kinbaku is linked with art, but art as practice not as picture. It's a movement, nothing frozen. An intimate practice, very deep, uncommon, challenging.
Very soon I saw shibari performances, I saw people cry, laugh, meditate, get excited. I saw a connexion, a conversation without words, or few.
And, experiencing it as model, but especially as rigger and self-suspender -even with a level yet to improve- I explored life itself, intensity through restriction. The ability you give for someone to surrender.
And shouldn't I mention beauty ? Quite surely in the techniques but especially in the energy, the emotion, of individuals towards the medium of rope.
When I first discovered kinbaku, I was drawn to it because I saw it as a new, interesting form of communication. It's sensual and erotic, but in my mind, it's something completely different from a verbal conversation or sexual intercourse. It can have similar effects, I think. It can make someone feel relieved, make some feel like they aren't alone, even for a period of time, similar to how one might feel after having a chat with a good friend, except no words are necessary. It can also make people feel loved, and special, I think, but perhaps not always/all the time. But that's one of the great things about it, I think. It can be used in so many different ways and have various outcomes, making it extremely versatile and unique from traditional modes of communication.
That's how I feel about kinbaku from the inside, but there's a lot that can be gained from the outside, too. It's obviously artistic and beautiful, can be used for performance, or to communicate something not just between the two who are directly involved in the tying, but to the crowd/people watching as well.
Thank you for sharing. While communication through rope does not require words, it’s really nice to such thoughts in words too. Despite my years practicing kinbaku, or perhaps due to years practicing kinbaku, I find it very difficult to encapsulate what I feel in written and verbal mode of expression. I think that -“It can also make people feel loved, and special, I think” - is something that can be felt from both the person tying and the person being tied. As a person tying, the energy and also the acceptance and trust that the person in my ropes gives to me touches many emotions on differing levels. So many things that are rarely said in words are communicated. At this point the only other person that exists in the person I am tying, and when that person shows the same to me, even if without words or gestures, it is very special.
I love that precise moment when the person I am tying completely let’s go. It can be a slight change in facial expression or the tension held in the muscles of the body. That is what drives me when tying (or untying) I guess. I mentioned untying because often this is the ‘icing on the cake’ so to speak. It is sensual, exciting, and at times spontaneous.
This is a great topic. With many answers. The one that comes to mind is...
Sex.
Just as there are many ways to have sex, and each person has sex in their own unique and personal manner, kinbaku is like that for me.
There is no right or wrong way to have sex or be intimate with someone. It will vary based on who you are intimate with at the moment. How you are both feeling. How long you've known each other. How comfortable you are.
No one can "teach" you how to have sex. It is instinctual. Yes, there are some "technical" aspects that a book or sex educator can tell you about. But ultimately each person will decide what works best for them.
Kinbaku is like that for me. It's a personal journey of learning and exploration. Discovering what works for me and the person I am tying. There is no one tie or method or style that I adhere to. It will vary based on many factors and will evolve overtime. The great bakushi Yukimura Haruki once said, "rope is free." And he is correct. What is right for me may not be right for someone else. And that's okay. That is how it should be.
That is the beauty of kinbaku. It is not a competition to see who can "tie" the perfect gote or make a more interesting hishi pattern. It's not about the rope at all. If you focus too much on the rope, you are missing the entire point. The rope is a tool in the tool box. Any type of material to bind can replace the rope.
Kinbaku is ultimately about the silent sharing and understanding that can happen between two people. An intimate sharing that does not have to be sexual at all. It can be intensely emotional. It can be erotic (or not). It can lead to joy, tears of sorrow, feelings of pain or pleasure.
Kinbaku is all that an more. And something that is very personal and special to each individual in our community.
Kinbaku came to me in 2016 during the summer, I just arrived in Paris to live my new life. First thing I did as an art student is to visit Guimet, the Asian Museum where a photographic exhibition was hold. There I discovered the work of Araki Nobuyoshi and though "that's what I want to do".
So, indeed, to me Kinbaku is linked with art, but art as practice not as picture. It's a movement, nothing frozen. An intimate practice, very deep, uncommon, challenging.
Very soon I saw shibari performances, I saw people cry, laugh, meditate, get excited. I saw a connexion, a conversation without words, or few.
And, experiencing it as model, but especially as rigger and self-suspender -even with a level yet to improve- I explored life itself, intensity through restriction. The ability you give for someone to surrender.
And shouldn't I mention beauty ? Quite surely in the techniques but especially in the energy, the emotion, of individuals towards the medium of rope.