@Dan T, you are most welcome. Milla san is building a community of like minded rope enthusiasts, so feel free to continue to post and we'll all reply as best we can. 🙂🙏🏼 D_D

Milla, Great explanation and I agree, learning is not linear. I've observed that some (not all) from the west learning kinbaku tend to focus on the technical vs. emotional/communication aspects. The image of a hand pointing up at the moon comes to mind. Instead of looking at the moon, some westerners look at the finger pointing up, thus missing the whole point. Your video series focusing on learning through observation is very Japanese (from what I understand). People tying pre-internet learned via observation and countless live viewings in pink bars or other related venues. Then taking what they saw and implementing it in their bedrooms. No class was given. No timed tests or levels of learning. No paper certificate was awarded. No lineage or "true way" of tying was imparted. Just a bakushi sharing intimate moments with the person being tied using rope as a communication tool. And the observers taking what they saw and personalizing that to meet their own style and kinks. I'm enjoying viewing Kinbaku Diaries because you are presenting kinbaku as I believe it should be shown. Thank you and your uketes for creating this great video series. 🙂🙏🏼 Darkly_Dreaming

@Dan T Dan, Kinbaku Today is always a great resource. I encourage you to check it out as there are many useful articles there with great information. Here are a few related to your question: https://www.kinbakutoday.com/mobilization-of-the-plexus-brachialis-nerve-branch/ https://www.kinbakutoday.com/a-guide-for-rope-bottoms-and-bondage-models/ https://crash-restraint.com/blog/2014/09/08/takate-kote-wrap-positioning-survey-results The last article has some very interesting conclusions. I'll defer to Milla with her experience to comment based on her experience. Respectful Regards, Darkly_Dreaming

Escrivio, welcome! Feel free to ask your questions on this forum.

@Dan T As I mentioned in a prior post, think of each person's rope style as their style for having sex/being intimate. Everyone has a style/preferred way of doing it right? Sometimes you meet someone that has more experience sexually than you. Sometimes you meet someone with less experience. Do you adjust your way of having sex based on the person you have sex with? Maybe? Maybe not? The important aspect is being true to YOUR way of having sex. What works for you and how you like to be intimate. The same applies for your rope. It doesn't matter if the person you are tying has more or less experience with rope. YOU can bring something unique with your style that the person being tied may never have experienced before. Maybe their will be a connection. Maybe there won't. And that's okay. Keeping your confidence, positive energy, and learning how to adjust your rope to the reactions off the person being tied and being true to you is important.

Hello Ombre. Good to "meet" you. 🙂🙏🏼 Always good to meet more people that love rope.

This is a great topic. With many answers. The one that comes to mind is... Sex. Just as there are many ways to have sex, and each person has sex in their own unique and personal manner, kinbaku is like that for me. There is no right or wrong way to have sex or be intimate with someone. It will vary based on who you are intimate with at the moment. How you are both feeling. How long you've known each other. How comfortable you are. No one can "teach" you how to have sex. It is instinctual. Yes, there are some "technical" aspects that a book or sex educator can tell you about. But ultimately each person will decide what works best for them. Kinbaku is like that for me. It's a personal journey of learning and exploration. Discovering what works for me and the person I am tying. There is no one tie or method or style that I adhere to. It will vary based on many factors and will evolve overtime. The great bakushi Yukimura Haruki once said, "rope is free." And he is correct. What is right for me may not be right for someone else. And that's okay. That is how it should be. That is the beauty of kinbaku. It is not a competition to see who can "tie" the perfect gote or make a more interesting hishi pattern. It's not about the rope at all. If you focus too much on the rope, you are missing the entire point. The rope is a tool in the tool box. Any type of material to bind can replace the rope. Kinbaku is ultimately about the silent sharing and understanding that can happen between two people. An intimate sharing that does not have to be sexual at all. It can be intensely emotional. It can be erotic (or not). It can lead to joy, tears of sorrow, feelings of pain or pleasure. Kinbaku is all that an more. And something that is very personal and special to each individual in our community.

Dan T., As with most things that I've discovered about kinbaku, there is no definitive answer. There are as many variations are there are ties and people that tie. You mentioned it yourself above. Tying different people, body types and moods (even the same person/body type can vary based on how they are feeling that day) can have an effect. I'd use what works best for you. What pleases you aesthetically. What "feels" right for the person being tied, and go with that. Getting the "technical" part of the tie down so that you can do it without thinking about it. This way you can focus on improving the silent communication/empathy with the person being tied. I find that the real skill in kinbaku is that. Knowing how your rope affects the person being tied and guiding them to their own personal journey. That is what takes a lifetime master. Respectful regards, Darkly_Dreaming

Milla, Thank you for creating these amazing videos. Learning through observation is how I've improved my kinbaku. The benefit is that as you grow with your skill, you will see new things each time you view the video.

Mark, A few thoughts about your post. As Milla indicated, untying (slowly or varying the pace) is one way to keep your wife's attention as you tie. If you blindfold her, by denying her sense of sight, she'll be forced to focus more with her other senses. Untying or tying will take on a new meaning for her as she will focus on the movement and feeling. The not knowing what you will be doing, will also help. Being unpredictable is another technique that you can apply. This is where Milla's suggestion of abandoning your "plan" and going with the flow (based on how she reacts to your rope) and what you are also feeling like at that moment and tying accordingly. Music helps too if you play soothing music that she can focus on and it is a great addition to your tying. The above can be used for a scene or practice. You'll have to modify the approach slightly depending on what you are trying to accomplish. Respectful regards, Darkly_Dreaming

There are lots of challenges in kinbaku for me personally. As you mentioned above, gaining a mastery of handling the ropes adeptly, observing the person being tied to pick up the subtle nuances of how the rope is affecting them, and then knowing how to combine those elements while trying to remain in the moment, is a challenge. I've been tying for a little over two years, and have much to learn. And as I learn more, I discover that the beauty of kinbaku for me is knowing that I'll always be making new discoveries.

Milla, I wanted to commend you for adding the forums to your website. It's a great idea to get the conversation going about all things related to kinbaku. I'll make sure to participate as I am able. Respectful regards 🙂🙏🏼